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21 July

2015 (written 22 July 2015):

It was so good to be back in the garden yesterday 🙂  I went up first thing in the morning, before I had time to get anxious about meeting people, and saw not a soul which is exactly what I wanted.  The people there are lovely but I worry so much just now about whether I will appear to be my usual self or not.  Because I am not my usual self and the mask I’m wearing is sometimes too heavy to carry.

I’m pleased with what I accomplished although the plots look the same as when I started.  But I finished digging out one compost bin and then started and completed a second.  Unbeknown to me, the second one had a colony of ants living in it but I didn’t realise until I’d lifted the cover and started digging so they will have to find a new home.  I did leave some compost on the ground when I put the cover back and refilled it so hopefully there will be enough ants in that to allow them to start over.

As the compost overflow situation is now somewhat improved I did a bit of weeding in Ailsa’s second potato patch but I was tired and my heart wasn’t in it so I decided to stop after gathering one bucket-load of weeds.

Back home for the evening I finally picked up my needles.  I finished knitting a scarf:

22ul15 - 1

I’ve been working on it on and off for months and still haven’t decided who it’s for!  It may well just go to the charity shop.  I’ve had the pleasure of making it and perhaps they’ll put it to a better use than I can.

Once the scarf was finished, I cast on a baby blanked.  I knit these for Oxfam although I’m thinking of keeping some and making myself a snuggly blanket from the squares.

22ul15 - 2

I only did a little work on this before bedtime but am pleased that I made it till 9pm before calling it a day.  Unfortunately I was still up before 4am this morning but surely, eventually I will sleep properly?  The best advice a psychiatrist ever gave me is to ‘guard’ my sleep and doing so kept me well for a long time …


4 thoughts on “21 July

  1. Can I ask…how do you ‘guard your sleep’?
    Well done for getting out into the garden, my greenhouse is my safe zone and compost under my fingernails seems more effective than any anti-depressant I’ve ever been given 😉

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